The Problem With Perseus Black (One-Shot)
by LadyClassical
Summary: Sirius Black has adopted Harry, and he names Harry godfather to his newborn son, Perseus. But the colicky new continuation of the Black male line quickly gets on Harry's nerves; in fact, Perseus seems to have sent the whole household into chaos. Should Harry just spend Winter Break at Ron's? Or can he bond with his screaming little godson? (Order of the Phoenix AU)


Ever since the day Sirius and his wife, Lucy, had brought baby Perseus back to the flat they shared with Harry Potter, Harry's life had changed dramatically—and not in a good way. At first, he had been fine with bringing his godson home. But now…

Could Harry really deny it that Perseus was just a brat? After all, he spent his entire existence screaming, and his cries sounded like a siren. But then all he had to do was smile his beautiful smile and Sirius and Lucy would love him all over again. Perseus was only a few days old, but Harry didn't think Sirius had taken a shower since the day they brought Perseus home from the hospital, and as for Lucy, well, she had just about lost her mind, at least in Harry's opinion.

Harry had managed to get three or four hours of sleep last night, but he was awakened by Perseus crying again. When he made his way to the kitchenette for breakfast, wading through the enormous amount of baby toys on the floor, remembering the baby gate, he found Sirius slumped over on the table, half-eaten toast in his mouth, and Lucy trying to console Perseus, but…

"Lucy, you're wearing Sirius's robes," Harry pointed out helpfully, but she gave him an "I-will-end-you" sort of look, and Sirius put his hands over his head like he was preparing for nuclear war.

"I KNOW that," she hissed.

"But why?" asked Harry, not noticing Sirius's frantic gesturing.

"BECAUSE I DON'T _FIT_ INTO MINE!" she screeched, and Perseus screeched too.

"Okay, you don't have to bite my head off!" Harry told her, and jerked open the refrigerator door. There wasn't much to eat in there, especially in terms of breakfast food. "Okay, who was supposed to go to the store last weekend?"

"Lucy was," said Sirius, "but you see, she kind of gave birth last weekend, in case you forgot."

"Oh, well God forbid anyone forget Perseus," Harry said angrily, grabbing another slice of bread out of the package.

"Eat some breakfast, Lucy dear." Sirius yawned as he took the colicky baby out of his wife's arms. "I'll go to the nursery and try to get him to sleep."

Lucy and Harry sat and ate their breakfast toast while they heard Perseus screaming in the nursery down the hall, and Sirius trying hard to calm him down.

"What are you looking at?" Lucy demanded.

"Nothing," Harry said truthfully.

"This is whole wheat toast, right?" Lucy looked at her bread. "Oh yeah…it is. Do you think it's okay to eat carbs if they're whole wheat carbs?"

"I think you should stop obsessing over it," said Harry. "Isn't there a difference between a bit of baby weight and full-blown fat?"

"Maybe," said Lucy. "I just thought all this would be over once the baby was here."

"What's 'all this'?"

"Pregnant stuff, hormones and all that…" Lucy shrugged. "I thought Evvy explained it all to you."

"She did, in great detail, and I do NOT need any more sex ed lessons from her," Harry said harshly.

"Well, her life's work is to deliver babies," Lucy pointed out. "She would know what she's talking about."

Harry shrugged, and the two of them ate their toast in silence.

Sirius walked back into the room not long after that, looking relieved but tired. "Well, Perseus is sleeping now. I suppose he'll wake up in an hour or so, but for now we're good. What'd I miss?"

"Lucy wants to know if she should eat whole wheat carbs," said Harry.

"What on Earth is a whole wheat carb?" said Sirius.

"Exactly." Harry nodded. "Also, she wanted to know why she's still…hormonal, I guess."

Sirius ran his hand through his hair, the way he always did when he was agitated about something. "I suppose you're just stressed, Lucy dear."

"I'm just worried…" Lucy's deep blue eyes were threatening to spill over with tears. "I'm worried that I'll be a bad mother. What if Perseus turns out to be a horrible person, and…and it's all because of _me?"_

"Well, look who _I_ lived with for all those years, and I turned out okay, didn't I?" Harry reminded her.

"That doesn't excuse their behavior, but Harry has a point." Sirius frowned. "I grew up with relatives who hated me, too—and I think I turned out all right."

"I just worry sometimes that maybe I won't be able to do this." Lucy sniffed.

"Listen, I think you're a great mother, and I don't know what I'd do without you," said Sirius, pulling Lucy into a hug. "Perseus loves you very much, and I know he loves you."

"I love him too," Lucy said tearfully.

"We both love him," Sirius said soothingly. "With all of our hearts."

"Want to go check on him?" Lucy looked tentative.

"Of course," said Sirius, helping her up, and they headed down the hallway to the nursery, not taking one backwards glance at Harry, who slowly got up from the table to rinse his plate at the sink, staring out the window of the London flat he lived in, along with Sirius, Lucy, and now stupid Perseus. Maybe he could share the flat with his new baby godson, but could he share Sirius, too?

…

The rest of the day was basically the same as the past few days had been. Lucy and Sirius spent all their time tending to Perseus while Harry stayed in his room, feeling like a piece of furniture. This evening, he'd been trying to do his homework, but Perseus had distracted him, and he was lying on his bed with pillows over his ears.

 _That's it,_ Harry thought, as the screams hit a combination of high-frequency and high-decibel that surely only Perseus could have hoped to achieve. _Tomorrow morning I'm setting off to the Burrow. They won't even miss me here, anyway._

Harry felt his insides burning with hunger, especially when he smelled meatloaf coming from the kitchen. Sirius had mentioned that Lucy couldn't cook, and during her pregnancy and before, they usually ordered takeout. But since Lucy was on her diet, she tried to eat home-cooked meals more often. Surely she couldn't go wrong with simple meatloaf. Besides, Perseus had quieted again for the moment, and Harry hadn't left his room all day, hoping Sirius would knock on his door and tell him to come out, but he hadn't. It was probably worth it to go to the kitchenette.

By the time he made it to the flat's miniature drawing room, Harry was steaming again. Sirius and Lucy were talking and laughing in the kitchen about Perseus.

"Oh, he's just gorgeous," Lucy was heard saying. "Sirius—he's going to be as handsome as you one day, you know that?"

"But he's got your beautiful eyes, Lucy dear, just like I hoped."

"What a little angel," Lucy cooed.

Perseus was anything BUT a little angel! Sirius and Lucy were blind to what a handful he was, and how they had seemingly forgotten about Harry, who they'd adopted. _Why did Sirius bother to adopt me if he was just going to focus on his own stupid baby? Isn't there room here for both of us? I guess not. Well, tomorrow I'm leaving, and they won't notice a thing_ —

"OW!" Harry let out an awful expletive as he realized he had stubbed his toe painfully on one of Perseus's baby toys, which were always scattered everywhere.

"Harry!" Lucy reprimanded him from the kitchenette, where the smell of meatloaf had turned a bit burn-like. "There are young ears here!"

"Well, maybe he shouldn't have so many freaking toys!" Harry complained as he entered the kitchenette. The burning smell became more prominent.

"Where've you been, Harry?" asked Sirius, who was feeding a bottle to Perseus while Lucy boiled vegetables.

"Who cares?" said Harry. "But I think someone should take that meatloaf out of the oven."

Lucy left the vegetables on the stove for a minute to open the oven. Unfortunately, what she got was a cloud of black smoke. Harry and Sirius coughed, and Lucy's lip quivered.

"I-I burnt the meat loaf!" Lucy looked thoroughly disappointed in herself.

"Shall I—shall I order takeout?" Sirius asked tentatively.

"I can't get takeout, I'm on a _diet!"_ Lucy burst into tears. "Gosh, Sirius, you are so _stupid_ sometimes!"

Startled by the sound of Lucy crying, Perseus swatted the bottle out of Sirius's hand and started screaming too. Sirius seemed like he did not know who to comfort first, and he looked at Harry helplessly.

"DON'T LOOK AT ME, IT'S _YOUR_ STUPID FAMILY!" Harry hollered, storming out of the kitchenette, down the hall, into his room where he slammed the door so hard he heard a chunk of plaster break off in the wall. Furiously, he opened his trunk and began throwing things into it at random. First light he would fly to the Burrow and he would not look back. At least there were no screaming babies at Ron's house.

By about nine in the evening, things had seemed to die down in the drawing room and kitchenette. Harry dared to venture from his room and see what was going on. Sirius and Lucy were sitting on the couch while Lucy held Perseus in her arms. They were both laughing. It seemed they had made up, but had they forgotten their adopted son?

Harry stayed up, hoping Sirius would come in and give them a chance to make up, too. But he didn't. They put Perseus to bed, then went to bed themselves, with Perseus screaming on and off. Sirius had to feed him a bottle, then Lucy had to change his diaper. It wasn't long before he was screaming again. Harry got up out of bed and crossed to the bathroom, hoping to find some cotton balls to stick in his ears. Halfway across the hall, though, the door to Sirius and Lucy's room opened.

"Hello, Harry," said Sirius. "What are you doing up?"

"Well, Perseus isn't exactly quiet," Harry muttered.

"Yes, I was just on my way to the nursery now, I expect he wants his father…" Sirius sighed and shut his eyes, gripping onto the doorknob, struggling to keep himself upright.

"Hmm…when was the last time you slept, anyway?" asked Harry.

Sirius shrugged passively. Harry noticed he looked worse than he ever had since they had first been reunited, just as bad as after he'd broken out of Azkaban. True, his hair was shorter, but it was almost as tangled, and the life seemed to have almost left his face. Indeed, he looked dead on his feet.

Suddenly Harry was filled with guilt. This was the man who had helped look after him as a baby, and helped him once he was a teenager too. In fourth year, until he got legally pardoned, he had been living in a cave and eating rats. When had there _really_ been a time when Sirius hadn't been there for Harry? If he was doing it now, did he even realize it? Did he really mean it?

 _How can I even have considered going to Ron's? Sirius needs my help_.

"Listen, Sirius, how about…how about I take this one?" Harry asked uncomfortably. "You can go back to bed. I bet I can get him to stop crying."

"Are—are you sure?" Sirius looked shocked.

"Think of it as a thank-you for all those times you babysat me," Harry replied.

Sirius smiled, squeezed Harry's shoulder, and reentered the bedroom. Harry, feeling nervous, crept down the hall to the nursery, where Perseus was screaming in his cot.

"Perseus?" Harry asked quietly. After a pause, he lifted the baby up, trying to remember the way he'd held him a few days ago, when he was in the hospital. Harry sat down in the rosewood rocking chair that used to belong to Lucy's parents, taking Perseus with him.

What could be the problem? Perseus had been fed, and he didn't need a diaper change. Usually he cried in the middle of the night, but why?

"Why are you crying, Perseus?" asked Harry, but then a thought hit him. "Are you…are you just lonely?"

Perseus was still wailing, face red, tears streaming down his face.

"I know what it feels like to be lonely," Harry continued, holding the baby against his shoulder. "But you know, Perseus—you've got a mommy and daddy who love you a whole lot. Just because they went away for a little bit doesn't mean they're gone forever."

Harry found himself getting tired, and even though he wanted to go back to bed, he knew he couldn't until Perseus fell back to sleep. This must be how Sirius and Lucy felt every night…no wonder they seemed to be going mental. Harry was tired of talking, so he just started rocking Perseus, patting his back every so often, and although he didn't know where it came from, he started humming a little tune, smoothing the baby's thick, black hair. The rocking chair was making him sleepy as he kept humming the song, a little more confidently now, until he noticed Perseus had stopped crying.

Looking down out of his aching eye sockets, Harry watched the warm little baby in fuzzy yellow pajamas sleeping peacefully on his chest. The tears were drying on his face now, and his whole body moved as he breathed in and out. Looking closely at Perseus, his lineage was clear—the fair skin, lustrous black hair and perfectly arranged features left no doubt that he was a Black. When he was sleeping, he did look like an angel, at least a little. Most people, when they saw him, agreed that he was gorgeous.

Harry finally stopped humming the song when he saw that Perseus was asleep; he leaned his head on his chest to sleep a little bit too, but he was awakened when he heard someone speaking:

"Good to see you two are finally getting along."

Startled, Harry looked up and noticed Sirius standing at the entrance to the nursery, leaning on the doorframe, looking tired as anything but mightily pleased.

"Oh…hi, Sirius." Harry looked down at Perseus. "I think he's asleep."

"Good job," Sirius replied, gently lifting the baby out of Harry's arms and setting him back down into his cot. "Thanks for the help."

"Perseus isn't so bad when he's sleeping, is he?" said Harry.

"No, I guess he's not." Sirius pulled up the side of the crib so Perseus wouldn't fall out. "Even if he is a lot of work when he's awake."

"I-I'm sorry if I've been…more of a hindrance than a help," Harry found himself saying, his eyes on the floor, walking over to stand by Sirius.

Something flickered in Sirius's eyes, his brow knitted. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, I haven't been helping with Perseus as much as I should have."

"We don't expect you to be his babysitter or anything," said Sirius. "You haven't been getting in the way of things at all, if that's what you thought—"

"What's 'things'?" Harry demanded, feeling angry again. "Whatever it is you two do with Perseus all day? Of course I'm not in the way, not if you don't feel like including me. You didn't even _notice_ how I stayed in my room all day—and you sit on the couch with Lucy and Perseus—but what about me? Am I even a _part_ of this household anymore?"

Sirius was frowning, looking down at Perseus, but Harry didn't think he was really looking at Perseus. Harry just stood there, fuming, until finally Sirius spoke.

"Why did you stay in your room all day?" he asked.

"Because…well, this isn't going to make any sense," Harry began, "but I was kind of hoping you'd try to make me come out."

"So you wanted attention, but you didn't want to ask for it." Sirius's arms were crossed on top of the side of the crib, his gray eyes facing forward. "Harry—why didn't you tell me about all of this before? If you felt left out, you could have just said something."

"I didn't—" Harry began indignantly, but then he stopped. "Okay, I guess I _did_ feel a bit left out. Like you three were the family, and I was some sort of unwanted guest."

Sirius looked as though he'd just been slapped in the face.

"Sorry," Harry mumbled.

"No, I'm sorry," said Sirius, and Harry was surprised to find himself wrapped in a tight hug. "I _never_ meant for you to feel that way. You mean the world to me—I thought you knew that."

"I thought Perseus meant the world to you," said Harry, although his voice was a bit muffled, and Sirius hugged him even tighter. When they finally separated, Harry's godfather had tears shining in his sunken eyes.

"Of course he does," said Sirius. "But don't you think there's enough of me to go around? For you, Lucy, and Perseus—the three people I love the most in the world?"

"Maybe," said Harry.

"Well, there is," said Sirius. "Perhaps sometime later this week, we can leave Perseus with Lucy's sister and just the three of us go out to dinner or something? I promise you'll have our full undivided attention."

"What about Lucy's diet?" Harry asked.

"I'm sure I can convince her to eat like a normal human for one day, at least," Sirius said. "She probably needs an evening out too."

"Honestly, though, I've never _met_ someone so hormonal," said Harry. "That must be annoying—how do you deal with someone like that?"

Sirius grinned. "Well, let's just say patience is a virtue."

"I guess." Harry shrugged.

"Now you get to bed," said Sirius, nudging Harry along. As they walked through the doorway, he added, "By the way…I didn't know you liked the Rolling Stones."

"What are you talking about?" said Harry. "I've never listened to them before in my life."

"Oh yes, you have," said Sirius. "You know that song you were humming to Perseus? 'Fool to Cry'? James used to sing that to you every night. It was sometimes the only thing that would get you to fall asleep."

"I thought I was just…humming." Harry felt a sort of lump in his throat. "I didn't know it was an actual song."

"Well, it is," Sirius replied. "I probably have the record somewhere. I can give it to you, if you want."

"Thanks," said Harry.

"And as for _you_ …" Sirius turned to face Harry. "Things are going to be different around here from now on, Prongslet. I promise you, you'll never feel left out again."

Harry smiled. "And I promise I'll help you and Lucy take care of Perseus."

"Deal," said Sirius, giving Harry another hug before sending him off to bed.


End file.
